kenderstest

(I am reposting this yet again because today I have had many hits on the search term "patron of befuddlement", probably just a bunch of people trying to figure out to which St. Obama would be partial, and this one I guess seems to fit)

Among many of the somewhat arcane subjects I study, mostly to answer questions posed to me or to win trivia challenges, (the history of the word "trivia" is great trivia in itself), is "Religious Arcanae". (yes, "Arcanae" is a word. Don't believe me? Come here and look at MY dictionary)

Anyway, my studies of little known and long forgotten religious lore has uncovered an obscure Saint.

In the early 14th century, in modern day France, there lived a man in a small village that was considered Holy by the local populace, (the man, not the village) by the name of Fu Lin Acrimonious D'Ialogue.


It is thought that Fu Lin Acrimonious D'Ialogue was the grandson of a local man that had gone away to Italy some years earlier and returned with stories of a far off place peopled by an exotic race of black haired and yellow skinned people that had conquered a great part of the world far to the east.


Modern theory holds that Fu Lin Acrimonious D'Ialogue most likely suffered from Tourettes syndrome, as he had a habit of walking around the village and spewing curses and outright lies at random, (although these "lies" would later prove to be truths, such as yelling out "You're all a bunch of cowards!!!") and never once did he back down from any of his outrageous statements.

Not even on the day that he died from choking on the local blacksmiths fist did he back down from the random insults that flew from his mouth or once apologize for any of the slanderous lies that was his meat in life.

In 1495 the Church, in a very quiet and now rarely discussed edict and recognizing the truths that Fu spoke nearly two hundred years before, made Fu Lin Acrimonious D'Ialogue a Saint.

In fact there is a prayer for his followers that I have managed to aquire through my very anonymous sources at the Vatican.

It is a prayer that needs to be brought to light and given the attention it deserves as it is also the default prayer of those that we on the right and in the right know as trolls.

Dear ST.FU,
Patron Saint of befuddlement and idiocy, please help us, your supplicants and unknowing followers, to keep our ill informed and whiny ass opinions to ourselves, lest we choke on a very large fist. Amen.